Seven

In scripture, seven symbolizes completeness or perfection. 

Last Friday, Lindsay, my mom and I, while out doing last minute Christmas shopping, stopped by Once Upon a Child, a store that buys and sells gently used baby paraphernalia.  I used to frequent this franchise, in Staten Island, when my kids were young- not to buy stuff, but to sell whatever either Lindsay or Kim had outgrown.  This particular store is in Massapequa, about 15 minutes away from me.  Lindsay wanted to stop off to see if they had a high chair or portable baby seat that I could use in my house for Lexi; she also wanted some fleece pajamas. 

Once Upon a Child is one of those “hit or miss” places because you never know if you will find what you are looking for or if you will find something that you might be looking for eventually.  But that day was our lucky day because we found a perfect portable high chair with a tray that even had toys that attach for the bargain price of $18.00 and two pair of fleece pajamas, as well.    

Soon after our lucky purchase, we had Lindsay, Scott and Lexi over for dinner and we got a chance to use the new (well, really used) portable high chair.  We strapped it onto one of my six dining room chairs.  And because Kim was in from Brooklyn, we needed to get out one of our extra folding chairs.  This never happened before; we were always six at my dining room table with my mom.  I realized at that moment- we are now seven.  Lexi made us seven.  And it finally dawned on me that my family is growing, as I looked over at our newest member who was sitting directly across from me, alternately playing with the toys on her high chair and eating her Mum Mum cookie. 

Lexi Grace turned seven months old this past Saturday.  She is sitting up now mostly by herself and slides on her stomach, although she only goes backwards.  She easily rolls from her belly to her back and then grabs her toes and giggles.  Just recently, while doing tummy time, instead of just sliding, she began to arch her back almost rocking on her knees.  Any day she will be crawling.  Then the fun begins.  Lexi will begin to initiate her freedom and that is both delightful and terrifying at the same time.  Baby proofing will become my life’s obsession.

Baby proofing is when you look at everything in your house and imagine its potential danger to an inquisitive teeny tiny human being.  Of course, when I'm with Lexi and she is on the floor exploring, I’m right next to her all the time.  But then I think of the first time when Lindsay accidently slipped while pulling herself up on her own book case, banging her forehead, which immediately grew a huge blue egg shape lump right in the middle.  I had been sitting right next to her.  As I recall, I don’t remember who was screaming louder at the time- Lindsay or I.  

This is the stage when my little granddaughter will start to detach a little bit more each day from protective arms and explore the world with more than just those dazzling blue eyes of hers.  Her little fingers are grabbing for things, constantly now; just the other day she pulled my glasses right off my face and I can no longer wear my large hoop earrings without her easily taking those out of my pierced ears in a split second.  She is enjoying all her Hanukkah toys, which pretty much take up most of the house.  Very often, you hear the cacophony of all the different sounds coming from those toys as she discovers all their shapes, colors and textures.  

I know Scott is the more willing to let Lexi leap into this next stage; he has been encouraging her to stand on her two little feet for a while now and she has excellent balance already.  Lindsay, like most mothers, would probably prefer her to be attached and dependent as long as possible.  Lexi has not even slept in her crib yet during the night- she is still in a corner of her parent’s bedroom in her pack’n’play. 

I understand how Lindsay feels.  I know that feeling.  I have that same exact feeling every day of my life since 1982.  Once you become a mother, you have this natural instinct to protect your child every second of their lives. That never leaves us.  ‘Baby proofing’ never really ends; we are almost always considering conceivable threats to the most precious things we have on this earth.  Besides for that, every stage of a baby’s development is also about every stage of the parents' development.  The baby just does what comes naturally.  But the parents research, inquire, get advice and google everything about what that child is doing and how best to respond to it.  

I was talking to a close friend, a fellow grandmother, recently, about all the things Lexi is doing now and some of the challenges Lindsay and Scott face, just like every other parent.  She said the smartest thing I ever heard about parenting.  It’s something I knew inherently, but never verbalized. 

“The role of a parent is to give your child the tools to become independent.”

So true, but yet again that very thought delights me and terrifies me at the same time.  However, giving our children the tools to be able to do the most basic things to survive on their own is really our job.  Animals know this instinctively. They can let go.  Mothers let go, sort of, but hold on at the same time, sometimes metaphorically, other times, literally. 

Seven months ago, all we did was hold this amazing little baby girl in our arms.  As each month passes we let go a little bit more while we behold how she is growing into her own little person, resembling neither of her parents exactly, just a perfect mixture of both of them.  When you are a parent, you are so busy living it every day, you don't notice the changes as much.  As a grandparent, it is so much more vivid.  

We are nearing the end of 2013, a year that brought us completeness and perfection– Lexi Grace.  And as we begin the year of 2014, I look forward to this wonderful little being, who makes my heart swell with love, becoming more of who she is meant to be. 

Happy New Year.